Girls: That Shit Is Just Too Real, And That's Why It's Gold
Watching Girls is like reliving the rawest and/or toughest and/or most embarrassing moments of your life. (That comes with the caveat that you're a millennial, college-educated woman who graduated in the middle of the Great Recession, anyway.) I've got friends -- mostly male ones -- who tell me I'm nuts to love this show, and some times they almost convince me that they're right. And then the show comes on again, and it resonates so much I simultaneously feel incredibly touched but also like I want to bury my head under the covers never to be seen again because that shit is just too real.
Let's be real about those sex scenes for a moment. Everyone always complains about them, and I'm pretty sure it's because they're not titillating; they're real. Whether it's Marnie's latest self-indulgent, spoken-for conquest who also happens to be her bandmate shoving his face in her ass while I'm pretty sure she's faking it, or Hannah being gently and missionarily screwed by a boyfriend who won't even look her in the face while she's clearly uncomfortable about how things are going, that's some Very. Real. Sex. Sex is not all Fifty Shades Of Grey/The Tudors/whatever porn your boyfriend watches. People have sex when they really just want to talk about something but don't have the balls to do it yet want to please their mate, but then feel like they're being plowed by a orgasm-seeking drone who couldn't care less about them. And people pretend they reeeeeeally like something they actually have no taste for if it gets their partner off. That's sex as much as Ryan Gosling shoving Rachel McAdams up against a wall in The Notebook is sex, comprende?
Trying to have a terrifyingly real conversation with a boyfriend who absolutely wants none of it, a la Adam insisting "there is no plan" when Hannah keeps trying to talk with him about how they are going to manage their long-distance relationship, can feel humiliating, annoying, fucked up, and just plain pointless. Dealing with a friend who should be happy for you but instead is just jealous and pissed that you're leaving her, like Jessa being a total dick to Hannah before she goes to grad school, just plain sucks.
These are not the moments we talk to our friends about over wine and hot tubs, or at our favorite bar, or during brunch, or when satisfying a mutual sushi craving. These are the moments that, when our best friend says, "How are things going with so and so?" we flash back to and feel an inexplicable face-burning shame like we did when some asshole kid called us a really dumb name on the playground, and instead of being honest we share a less fucked up anecdote. But the one replaying in the backs of our minds isn't actually fucked up. It's just real.
These are the moments Lena Dunham not only touches on but puts on full display for 25 straight minutes every time a new episode of Girls airs. It's a little painful to watch, but ultimately gratifying that finally someone on television is being honest about these things. And that is why I will forever <3 Girls.